The Bottom Button Rule Followed My Cardigan Home From My Blazer, Apparently
I buttoned a cardigan on a client three weeks ago exactly the way I’d button a blazer. Top hole first, working down, skip the bottom one on instinct, like my…
Whether A Womens Dress Shirt Gets Tucked In Depends Entirely On The Cut
I stood in a fitting room in River North for eleven minutes trying to figure out why a shirt that fit perfectly untucked looked like a paper bag the second…
Socks With Loafers Is Apparently A Rule Now, Nobody Sent Me The Memo
My brother Sam sent me a photo last week of some guy’s ankles at a wedding, bare, loafers, tan line already forming from the day, captioned “this is apparently wrong…
Nobody Told Me Light In The Loafers Was A Slur Until Someone Pointed It Out
I said it in a work meeting. Casual, no weight behind it, describing a guy from another department who’d picked out the good caterer for a launch event. “Oh, he’s…
Blazers Have The Same Hidden Stitch As Trench Coats And I Never Noticed Either
I wore my brother Sam’s old blazer to a client dinner in March, sat down at the table, and felt it pull weird across the back like the fabric was…
A Blazer That Doesnt Cover Your Bum Is Apparently A Whole Category Of Wrong
A client texted me a photo from a dressing room last month, blazer on, one hand on her hip, the other holding her phone at that angle we all use…
Sandals At A Funeral Feels Wrong Until The Weather Gets Involved
I stood in a parking lot in July, ninety-four degrees, holding a pair of black flats I bought specifically for this funeral, and I could feel my feet swelling in…
I Worried Sandals At A Funeral Would Read As Disrespectful, Maybe I Was Overthinking It
I stood in my closet for eleven minutes on a Tuesday morning deciding what to put on my feet for a funeral, which tells you something about my priorities and…
Suit Trousers Feeling Snug After Lunch Made Me Question The Fabric
I have genuinely spent longer thinking about my waistband than most people spend deciding whether to buy a house. I know this because I once stood in a fitting room…
Nobody Could Tell Me Where The Word Sweater Came From
I called it a “sweater” for probably eleven years before I said the word out loud to myself and thought, wait, that’s a weird word. Not “cardigan,” not “jumper,” not…